House Filk

(may be sung to Hallelujah, Leonard Cohen)

Each time we see this show begin,
it's "Coreopsis has set in"...
...Or something kind of like that to engross us.
That pain excuse is growing thin,
But still House pops a Vicodin.
And we can't wait to hear his diagnosis.

   Ichthyosis,
   Keratosis,
   Dyshidrosis,
   Diagnosis.

Now with the boss he once did tryst,
He roomed with the oncologist,
And neither was a bit like symbiosis.
When on the case he does persist:
He follows every turn and twist,
But loses interest with diagnosis.

   Sarcoidosis,
   Trichinosis,
   Spondylosis,
   Diagnosis.

The patient's heading to relapse:
Her blood cell counts are off the maps,
And death is now the probable prognosis.
They're breaking out the spinal taps...
...In House's brain the right synapse
Is triggered, and he's got the diagnosis.

   Brucellosis,
   Anhidrosis,
   Halitosis,
   Diagnosis.

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