Magnus Retail

by Mary Crowell


dm6                              gm6
Some-times a wiz-ard's bag of tricks
            Bb7             A7   dm6 A7
Needs a lit-tle help, a real quick fix.
    dm6                       gm6
If that's the case, you know what to do.
              Dm6                             A7                  dm6
Call me, Mag-nus re-tail for the spells that cast true.

dm                           A7
Your spell won't cast? I'll make a-no-ther.
Dm6                         A7
Gla-mour won't last? Don't call your mo-ther;
            dm6         gm6          Bb7                   A7         dm6
I'm the ge-nu-ine ar-ti-cle, an al-che-mist, and ge-ni-us squared.

You need si-gils and signs? Pay me mo-ney.
Words to com-bine that don't sound fun-ny?
The-sau-rus, pro-cu-rer, bus-iness-man and ge-ni-us squared.

You say that you were walk-ing a-long,
When you tripped and fell and broke your wand.
          Bb7                       dm6
Don't throw a-way your ail-ing stick.
            Dm6             gm6        Bb7     A7
I'll fix it,       paint it,           po-lish it slick.

Scry-ing to do? I can find it.
An en-chant-ment or two? I've re-fined it.
Clan-de-stine, done with ut-most dis-cre-tion by a ge-ni-us squared.

You want a car-pet to fly? I can de-li-ver.
A mer-maid's left eye? Shipped down the ri-ver.
I spe-cia-lize in mer-chan-dise of ma-gic; I'm a ge-ni-us squared.

I've got am-u-lets made of sil-ver and gold;
Rings from queens a mil-len-i-a old.
Wreak fla-ming death! Cause mi-se-ry!
There's just a small non-ne-go-tia-ble fee.

Life's a lit-tle less grim when it's en-chan-ted.
An im-pos-si-ble whim can be grant-ed.
Cross my palm, and it is SOLD by a ge-ni-us squared.

There's some-one you fear.  Need a favor?
Should he dis-ap-pear?  I'll be you sa-vior
As long as pay-ment's in ad-vance as I de-mand, a ge-ni-us squared.

There's a witch whose looks are gi-ving you trou-ble.
Sa-ba-tra's her name with a boil and bub-ble.
She's a cou-sin of mine, and I'm sure you can see --
Why I dou-ble my fee when it's close fa-mi-ly.

(Spoken: Sooooooooo, you tell me . . .)
Your spell won't cast? I'll make a-no-ther.
Gla-mour won't last? Don't call your mo-ther.
I'm the ge-nu-ine ar-ti-cle, an al-che-mist and ge-ni-us squared.

So, come on down! Ma-gic whole-sale!
Best deals in town! Mag-nus Re-tail!
I'm the ge-nu-ine ar-ti-cle, an al-che-mist and ge-ni-us squared!

Copyright © Mary Crowell